Last night when I came home from gathering supplies for todays Friendsgiving, the two trees that rise behind my house like spindly fork tines were covered in tiny, shadowed sparrows. There was a whole flock, making a chorus of sound as they jumped and flew out and up, circled back, re-settled on the branches. Over and over. Birds of no particular color, in the evening light.  Sometimes silvering blue, sometimes ash black, sometimes the color of globe eggplant. Weaving through patterns of wind and electric forces that I can't see or feel or consciously understand, out and in from those trees.

I've always considered signs, in life. I was raised to believe in them -- my parents and I still talk of the signs we encounter in life or in dreams, despite our differing religious beliefs. Now that I've changed my name to Byrd, I suppose it will be hard not to see thin-boned feathered creatures as signs, constantly. But in life there are some moments that focus out more clearly than others. There are forgotten times when you encounter a dove eating a french fry in a parking lot. There are mystical times when you watch an eagle catch a snake off of the highway and eat it in mid-air. And there are the seasonal times caught in the golden glow of early winter evenings, when sparrows spinning over your house preparing to fly south seem to be telling you  "this home is excellent for Birds -- as a resting place or in-between place. Enjoy it while it's still glowing here."

So I will.

I'll spend afternoons in my kitchen steeping cinnamon and vanilla and anise in a honey-maple syrup. I'll toast nuts and make a slurry for a custard. I'll bake a pie and watch it cool as the light changes from fire to ice. And I'll enjoy a slice or two in the coming days, offering plates to friends, watching my Byrd man attempting to resist a third slice in a row. Pie, for some reason, can make a moment feel more like a moment. If you catch my meaning. A slice of pie for breakfast, with a carefully drawn cup of coffee, making the flickering fire in our wood stove & books and paintings and old records stacked on the coffee-table seem more real.

Quietly enjoying a slice.

Now, this particular pie is, to me, a self-confident, sexy, curvy lady with dreams and aspirations. A pie with a vision. Sure, she's a sturdy, sweet slice of something sweet. But she's deeper than your day-to-day fruit variety. She has more weight and, honestly, can mess you up a lot faster than a taste of apple (sugar high). She's pretty happy just the way she is -- spicy, laced with a little bit of rum, exotic in a way it's hard to put a finger on. If pie wore lingerie she would be wearing some. A little lacy something -- just for her.

So, you see, I've probably spent more time thinking about how to talk about pie this week than is healthy for a person. But who cares? Tis the season to make/eat/think pie.

You know pecan pie? Yeah, basically candy pie with nuts sprinkled in i.e. crack pie. This pie is a variation on the classic pecan variety. With tons of aromatic cinnamon, anise, and vanilla bean. It's the most perfect thing. My kitchen smells like a holiday dream.

This crust recipe is adapted just slightly from Dolly and Oatmeal'sgluten and dairy free pie crust on Food52. And the pie recipe is adapted from another Food52 recipe by Merrill Stubbs -- the Spiced Maple Pecan Pie with Star Anise. My iteration is slightly different -- with more spices, the addition of honey, and ghee substituted for butter. I feel pretty strongly that, despite how finicky the process of pie making can be (especially one involving infused syrups), it's worth it. This one is, anyway.

Spiced Honey-Maple Macadamia Nut Pie (Gluten Free, Dairy Free)

Serves:

8-12 servings

Ingredients

Pie Crust

• 1/2 cup sorghum flour
• 1/4 cup white rice flour
• 1/4 cup gluten-free oat flour
• 1/4 cup Bob's Red Mill All-Purpose Gluten Free Flour
• 1 teaspoon psyllium husk (whole or powdered are both fine)
• 1 tablespoon coconut sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon fine sea salt
• 1/2 cup virgin coconut oil, cold + more to brush your pie plate
• 3 to 6 tablespoons ice water

Filling

• 1/2 cup unfiltered honey
• 1/2 cup grade A maple syrup
• 1/2 cup raw cane sugar (coconut sugar also works, adding a molasses-like flavor)
• 2 whole star anise
• 2 cinnamon sticks, ~3 inches long each
• 1 vanilla bean, split and scraped
• 2.5 cups macadamia nuts
• 3 large farm fresh eggs
• 4 tablespoons ghee, melted (or coconut oil if you're dairy free)
• 2 tablespoons dark rum
• 1/4 teaspoon coarse sea salt
• *vanilla (or coconut!) ice cream for serving

Instructions

The Crust:

1. Preheat the oven to 400F. Grease a 9" pie plate with a light coating of coconut oil -- I find an angled pie plate no deeper than 1.5 inches is best.
2. In the bowl of a food processor, combine the dry ingredients: sorghum, rice, oat, and all-purpose gluten free flours, psyllium, coconut sugar, and salt. Pulse to combine.
3. Cut your cold coconut oil into chunks. Add the coconut oil to the bowl of the food processor, with your dry ingredients, and pulse 10-15 times to incorporate.
4. Working one tablespoon at a time with the food processor running, add ice water until your dough holds together when you squeeze a handful of it in your fist (test after each tablespoon).
5. Using your hands, bring the dough together into a smooth ball and place on a wide sheet of parchment paper lightly dusted with flour. Flatten into a disc, wrap in the parchment, and refrigerate for 30 minutes.
6. Remove the dough from the fridge and place on your work surface (unfold the parchment paper from around the dough).
7. Let it rest for 5 minutes, then work gently with your hands in a kneading motion for 2 minutes.
8. Flour a rolling pin and work the dough out into a 12" circle -- if you get cracks in the dough as you roll it out press the cracks back together or patch with extra dough (gluten free dough is very forgiving, thankfully).
9. Flip your pie plate upside down and slide over the top of your pie crust.
10. Gently slide your hand underneath of the parchment paper and flip the crust and pie plate right side up.
11. Press the pie crust into the pie plate and remove the parchment paper.
12. Tuck the overextending edges under (or cut them off, it's up to you).
13. [i]To create a pinched crust[/i], place your left thumb on the inside of the pie plate and bring your right thumb and forefinger to the outside of the pie plate. Press outwards into the crust using the left thumb, using the right thumb and forefinger on the outside of the crust -- pinching the outer edge in a little V. I sort of see it as creating a U with your left thumb, and a V with your right thumb and forefinger. Continue all the way around.
14. Prick the bottom of the crust with the tines of a fork all over. Freeze the crust for 15 minutes, or refrigerate for 30 minutes.
15. Bake the crust for 12 minutes, then remove and set aside until needed.

[b]To make the filling: [/b]

1. Add the honey, maple syrup, star anise, cinnamon sticks, scraped vanilla bean seeds and the vanilla bean pod to a small sauce pot.
2. Bring to a boil over medium high heat, then reduce the heat to a simmer for 15 to 20 minutes. The syrup will have reduced by half.
3. Remove from heat and set aside for 20 minutes to an hour so that the spices infuse deeply.
4. While the syrup is infusing, toast the macadamia nuts on 350F for 15 minutes, stirring the nuts once half way through. Remove from heat and cool 10 minutes.
5. Place the pot of syrup over low heat just to make it pourable but not hot. Don't stir the syrup or you'll create crystals and it may harden.
6. Remove from heat and, using a fork, remove the anise, cinnamon sticks, and vanilla bean pod (you can either discard them or, well, I basically sucked on them like they were candy once they fully cooled).
7. In a medium bowl, whisk together the syrup, eggs, ghee, rum, and salt. Fold in the macadamia nuts.
8. Pour the filling into the pie crust and transfer the pie to a wide rimmed baking sheet (so that you don't get syrup bubbling over into the bottom of your oven -- not fun).
9. Bake 35 to 40 minutes, until the pie is firm to the touch but still a little bit jiggly in the center. Remove and cool to room temperature and serve with vanilla or coconut ice cream.

3.2.2885

You know pecan pie? Yeah, basically candy pie with nuts sprinkled in i.e. crack pie. This pie is a variation on the classic pecan variety. With tons of aromatic cinnamon, anise, and vanilla bean. It's the most perfect thing. My kitchen smells like a holiday dream.

This crust recipe is adapted just slightly from Dolly and Oatmeal'sgluten and dairy free pie crust on Food52. And the pie recipe is adapted from another Food52 recipe by Merrill Stubbs -- the Spiced Maple Pecan Pie with Star Anise. My iteration is slightly different -- with more spices, the addition of honey, and ghee substituted for butter. I feel pretty strongly that, despite how finicky the process of pie making can be (especially one involving infused syrups), it's worth it. This one is, anyway.